Pretty much ever since I started in this fandom a year go, I have been hearing about this feathersmmmmmyumyum person (I never knew how many MMMM's to put after her name).
I remember chatting with the girlies in the BBR (That is the Rob Pattinson Eye Candy room over at Twilighted. We called it the Boom Boom Room) about fics. The convos would go something like this:
SUE: I FUCKIN LOVE THE FUNNY
Random galpal: you should read ILLA
SUE: WTF is ILLA
Randomgalpal: an RPF by Feathersmmmm
SUE: IDK I do not like RPFs they squick me out
RandomGalPal: DOOO IT
SUE: YES MAM
So I started it... I love her writing. She is funny, she is fun, snarky, witty etc. Sadly, I could not get over my own squick factor about it being an RPF... SO I SWORE that if this author EVER wrote anything else for any fandom I WOULD READ IT.
WELL ONE day I was trolling the boards at Twilighted and I came across it.
Edward WallBanger by feather..mmmm
The title alone had me intrigued. That it was by this much-talked-about author had me all excited.
I read the Summary :
Summary: Bella moves into a fantastic apartment building in San Francisco. Guess who lives next door? With walls this thin, the tension is gonna be thick...
I saw the temporary banner
TEE HEE... he is coming soon! Told you I was 12!
And saw the flashy thingie:
I saw the first chapter was up, so I read that and I laughed... and I fangirled... and I told everyone to read it.
I even visited the forum and at one point I posted what I saw as Wallbanger.
LONG story short, I LOVE THIS FIC!
I wanted to collect her as one of the authors I interviewed!
So I contacted her ...
And she was all excited (I am flattered about that).
So WHY does SUE love this story
It is damn funny.
The women in this fic are strong, intelligent and don't take shit, but still feminine, and the guys *swoon*!
I love that this story is about building on a friendship.
I love the snarky remarks.
OH, just go read it LOL!
Here is the convo with the lovely Miss Alice! I hope you read ALL the way to the end cause there is some neat stuff in here, and some cool news that everyone already knows, but I am pimpin' the news here as well!
S: OK. Ready?
A: Hit it.
S: I ask the same Qs of every author. A boring game of 21 Qs with me.
Where did you get the idea for this story? What was your inspiration?
S: Yes hon.
A: It came really strangely. I was shopping at Petsmart,
A: And they were remodeling one side of the building to make a new pet hotel and the store next door was complaining about all the banging and I thought wouldn't it be funny if that's how Bella and Edward meet, from him banging on the wall the whole time before they actually meet.
And then i called Nina and told her i had my new story, and when I came up with the title, BAM.
The whole thing was written in my head within about 5 mins.
S: ALL the way to the end??
A: Now if i could only write the fucker that quickly.
Yep, its been outlined since the very beginning.
A: I havent changed it at all.
S: Good, cause it is damn funny.
A: I always knew the ending.
S: I've re-read it... You know, for research. *UHEM*
A: Should be interesting to see how it is received.
S: I know, I take this seriously, and it is even funnier the second time around. I caught things I did not the first time
A: Aw thanks:)
S: And I LOVE that the couples are set up different to begin with.
A: Yes, i thought that would be a fun twist. I wanted to play with the idea that sometimes, what you think you want is NOT what is right for you.
S: That is VERY true. OH, and Hubs said to tell you that if you wanted to write Esme getting gangbanged by the guys on the golden gate he is OK with that.
A: And sometimes, whats right in front of you is actually perfect, if you can see it. And YES to a GG gangbang.
S: I LOVE thier toast at the end of the last chapter. *SWOON*... He seems to know more about his feelings than she does. It gave it umph.
A: That was a last minute addition, added that literally right before the chapter posted. It originally ended before they walked into the house. But it needed a little extra oomph, so I threw that in at the end. The dialogue i never have planned out, it just comes out as fast as I can type it.
S: Wow. OK, question number two.
Is there anything you want the reader to know specifically either about your story or about yourself?
S: I ask the tough ones.
A: About the story i just want everyone to be patient, i know how much it sucks when your stories dont update as often as you want them to. I am a reader first, author second, and I get just as excited still when my faves update. But I also have a thousand other things going on, and I would never want a reader to get a shitty chapter just in the interest of a quick update, ya know??
S: I noticed you rec about as many fics as I do.
A: As far as me, hmmmm. What do I want you to know? I guess that I am having a blast writing this stuff, and I am just grateful that its been received as well as it has been. I get a lot of reviews saying they like this story because its a break from the other angsty stories they have been reading, and also a little break from real life, too. I read a shit ton of angst, so i get it, sometimes you just need some silly. And as i say on the wallbanger thread, 'welcome to the crazy'.
S: I am not big on angst and there is TONS out there. I love the funny.
A: I loooove angst, but really, I just love a good story. That's all I need.
S: It gets to be too much. I do not like angst for angst sake.
A: But there are not a lot of funny stories out there. I wish there were more.
S: Much like there are tons of well written non smutty stories.
I do TOO, but writing funny is not easy.
A: Funny is easy for me to write, I dont know how I would do trying to write angsty.
S: I hear it takes a lot outta you, to write tons of angst.
A: When I write, I think 'what would I want to read? What would I need?' And thats how I craft a scene. 'What would knock me out?? What would make me giggle?'
S: WELL The Nook slayed me.
S: So sweet, and him folding his moms afgan.
A: Yes, using nook as a noun and a verb is fun.
A: And we all seem to have a visual on that afghan. We all have it, or we had it growing up.
S: I know I do.
A: Especially the orange and pea green ones.
S: Mine was made in the 70s.
A: They were issued at some point.
S: And brown! That is the color it was!
A: They were all made in the fucking 70's.
S: And the 70s is coming back. EEEEK!
A: The one i had had tassles on the ends... *shudders*
S: Mine was a knit zig zag pattern.
S: With a matching throw pillow! SAWEET
A: Oh dear.
S: I KNOW. Mom was crafty.
Why do you think Readers should read your story?
A: I don't think they should.
A: I'm just grateful when they do. :) I was such a fucking pimp with my first story. I was shameless... hahaha
S: OK then, how about this - If you were reading just randomly and you came across your story but was not writing it why would you rec it to your friends? And if that makes sense then IDK.
A: hmmmm. I would say "read this story, fucking feathersmmmm is awesome!"
"And she has a sweet rack."
S: and a serious obsession with Kitchenaid products. (me too)
A: Oh man, you have no idea. When we finally get married, Kitchenaid is going to be very very happy.
S: I got the mixer and a food processor from Kitchenaid. Now all I need is the blender and I will be happy. For about 6 months.
S: Question 4.
Do you do anything special while writing, like listen to music, need total silence, eat a bag of M&Ms, drink heavily ....whatever?
A: Not really, although I do tend to write the most when I am at Panera. Headphones on, usually listening to The Prodigy for some reason. I tend to try to write to the beat...makes me write faster or something.
A: If I write at home, I start doing laundry or messing with the cats. Can not focus.
S: OHHH! Do you have a cat like Clive?
A: haha... I have 2 cats. And Clive is a combo of both. :)
S: Me too. I love him strutting around like he is wearing a smoking jacket. My cats are above such things... or so they think.
A: Yes. That was an image that was very strong in my mind. I had to get it down on paper. Or laptop.
S: They only come to you when they are cold and want to sit on the electric lap blanket. I just see that cat doing that. The imagery translated VERY well.
A: You know, cats are strutters anyway. It's not hard to imagine the smoking jacket and the tiny Q-tip cigarette.
S: Not at all. YES. LOL... My cats steal Qtips all the time.
What do you do after you click the Submit button for a chapter?
A: Hmmmm. Sit back and wait to see if what I didnt like in the chap will show up in the reviews.
S: AHHH. Unique answer.
Do you have a sound track to your story?
A: Well, yes and no. I definitely use the big band songs that Wallbanger plays for inspiration. I listen to music quite a bit, and it definitely influences me.
S: I love that part. Dad listened to nothing but big band so I know all those groups.
A: Yes... I love that music. Makes me feel very happy.
What Actor /Actress so you see as your Edward/Bella?
A: Bella in my head has always been Jennifer Love Hewitt, Wallbanger Bella. And Edward... well... at one point he was Rob. And fucking hell when the pics came out of him wearing a WHITE IRISH SWEATER. I thought... Jesus, someone is reading Wallbanger that is styling that shoot!!!
S: I thought the same thing!
A: But he is kind of a faceless Edward in my head.
S: You already answered this but I ask it anyways. Question 8...
Is this story all planned out or is it a fly by the seat of your pants thing?
A: Story is planned. Scenes are outlined as I craft each chapter, like, chapter 13a, 13b, 13c, etc. But when I sit down to write a scene.... not planned at all.
S: So you know where the scene is, what they will do, but not how they will act?
A: Um, yes and no. When I outline the chapter, I know the nuts and bolts of what will happen in each scene, BUT I dont know how they will do it or how they will get there until I sit down to write it. And I only write one scene at a time.
A: If I know I dont have time to finish the scene, I dont start it. That's why its been taking me so long to update. I dont like to start a scene unless I know I can finish it, or it starts to lose the flow.
S: Well, you have a life so people just need to accept that. I've got fics tht have not updated in over 6 months.
S: So waiting a month or 2 is nothing... LOL
A: As much as I would like to make my living writing this, I can't. So, real life comes first.
A: I am just very very lucky that the wallbanger readers are the best readers out there, and when I came back from hiatus, I was quite nervous. Wasn't sure the reception I was gonna get. And everyone was so damn sweet. Makes me love it even more.
S: You were only gone from writing for what, 2 months?
Well, that is good. This is suposed to be a fun hobby for EVERYONE.
A: Yes, exactly.
S: And we are getting free entertainment.
A: There are those in our fandom that take this shit too seriously. Now, I am serious about it, and I love and honor this fandom... BUT I refuse to lose sleep over some of the shenanigans that go on. I simply wont have it. No drama.
A: Zero tolerance.
S: We don't need more drama.
Do you believe in HEA?
S: This is my NOT so subtle way of asking how the story will end.
A: I do believe in HEA, however, I do not believe that HEA means the same to everyone. And thats all I will say.
S: Sneaky!! LOL
A: I give nothing away. Ever.
S: I never expect an author to answer with the ending but I cant resist asking
S: LOL... So you can be sneaky all you like, hold onto that ending I am enjoying the ride. I skipped one about posting schedule cause you already answered it.
Give me a list of your current fandom projects, and do you have any more fic plans for the future?
A: I have slowed down on a lot of things within the fandom, simply because I dont have the time I used to. I do the Twigasm podcast, and I am contributing to a few bday surprises out there. But finishing wallbanger is my top priority, fandom-wise. And yes, I am working on a new story....
Just ideas right now, and I dont know whether it will eventually evolve into a fic or not.
S: Can I tell people about the Omnific thing? And when that will be available?
A: Sure you can. All the info is on the site.
S: K. Awesome.
A: The Unidentified Redhead will be available for purchase February 16th. Very, very exciting.
S: I'm excited too!
A: thx love. I know it is a little controversial in the fandom right now. But ultimately, I think people will be really proud of the authors.
S: NO problem! I am THRILLED that these stories are getting an outlet for the general public. I am so proud for this to be happening. It is a neat way for the work to be put out there and to get covered better.
A: Yes, there is so much talent in this fandom.
S: I agree.
A: And the opportunity this will provide for some of the authors is soooo exciting.
S: Getting published is not an easy thing to do, and I know I have read fics that are better than some of the books on my shelves.
A: Well, I am flattered and proud to be involved, and I can't wait to see what happens. It's a great way for people outside the fandom to read some fun stories, too.
What brought you to Fanfic? To Twilight?
A: Twilight was given to me by someone I worked with in September of 08. Fanfic I found on my own after I read thru the books fast and furious, and I needed something more. I started reading and I never looked back.
What is your background in writing?
A: Zero... hahaha.
But literally, zero. I wish I had some amazing literary background, but I don't. I just see things in cinemascope. I always have.
S: Most FF authors dont have an amazing literary background.
A: I am always casting stories in my head and wondering, 'what would happen if...' and pow! Now I actually go further with these characters and make up my own little scenarios.
What is your FanFic Pet Peeve?
A: hmmmm. I don't really have a lot. I get tired of reading phrases over and over again, like 'tongues battling for dominance'...
A: 'begging for entrance', or Nina's favorite, 'I let out the breath I didnt know I was holding'.
S: LOL... Those are FF cliches that make me as a reader roll my eyes.
A: Yes, we all do. And yet, I still read it. But ya know, ultimately, who the hell am I to say what someone else should or shouldn't write.
A: That's why I dont really go off in the fandom. If I have a complaint, I share it with my own tiny group. I never vent in public. 1, who cares what I think, and 2, why be nasty??
S: I also think that as "big" readers we see those more than your average reader. I bring up overused cliches for those who write but might not read as much as I do. They do not know what has been seen in tons of fics.
A: Fucking hell, I read a shit ton.
A: I can't review much because I read mostly on my blackberry, so I always rec fics, either on twitter or in my chapters. That's how I try to highlight fics that I feel passionately about.
S: You also read over all genres
A: Yes, I do.
S: Which is something I don't do.
A: I am not limited to any genre, I just need a good story. It's that simple. Who am I to say "I will never read a Jasper fic"? Is he my fave?? No, but then I read something amazing like Murmur of Fire in The Vein, and thank Christ I read it.
What is your Fandom Pet Peeve?
A: People with too much time and an axe to grind. Seriously?? Is anyone actually hurting you?? I always want to say this when people get all pissy about some new fuckery... Is anyone actually hurting you? Is the fandom fuckery preventing you from paying your mortgage? Feeding your family? Running your mother over?? I just wish people would think sometimes before they rage, and I think people are so much nastier when hiding behind a keyboard than they would be face to face.
*steps down off soapbox*
S: VERY TRUE. Hard to be mean when you remember there is a real person on the other side.
A: Well, it's easy to be mean when you are trying to be an asshole.
A: I think so many of these people that get so angry are revisiting high school. Maybe they were picked ON so now they do the picking. I WAS the bitch in high school. Believe me, it isn't a good thing.
Which character in your story do you identify with most?
A: None, but I wish I were Esme. She is based on 2 of my mentors.
S: SO DO I. Your Esme is so amazing.
A: The house with the hillavator is real, and so damn cool. I have been very lucky to have strong smart women as my mentors. Makes all the difference.
S: In your story which character do you see yourself with as friends or more?
A: I like the relationship between Bella and Esme a lot, because work CAN really be like that when you work with amazing people. But I am really fond of the relationship between Bella and Edward.
I love the idea of love at first sight, but that shit rarely happens. So I wanted to explore a relationship that ISNT sunshine and rainbows from the beginning, and I like the build up. As is often the case, usually people are friends first. Now, I have been out of the dating scene for a long time but back in the 1890s, when I was single, I was always friends first with the guys I dated. It happens much more organically that way.
Which real life author inspires you?
A: I actually can't answer that. I don't read as much fiction as I used to, and so I can't say.
Which fanfic author inspires you?
A: I can't say who inspires me, but I can tell you who I wish I could write like - pastiche pen, itzmegan, halojones, ninapolitan, ezrocksangel, sinandshame, in a blue bathrobe... These women continually amaze me.
S: (Sue is just nodding her head in agreement)
If you could have 15 minutes with any Edward from FF, or SM's Edward who would you choose and what would you do? IF you do not like any of these options you can pic one of the cast members for your 15 minutes.
A: I want SM's Edward, and Rob for the other 15. Which I would take an additional 1 since its my fantasy and I fucking can.
S: GO FOR IT!
2 more short Questions.
Any Recs for us?
A: This is fun. Jesus, of course. Hide and Drink by savage. Dark Games and Twisted Minds (can't think of the author right now...katinki something).
Expectations and Other Moving Pieces by chrometurtle.
S: LOVE IT
A: I think those will be recs for a banger chapter
S: K, last Question.
Anything else you would like to add?
A: Yes. I am emphatically TeamUma.Otherwise known as TeamExperiencedOonie. Or TeamBreakThatBoyInHalf.
S: LOL She is gonna smoke up the screen with Rob. Boy will leave that set a MAN.
A: TeamSmackThatBitchUp. Rob being the bitch, obviously. Also, when did Marie Osmond become Chinese??
A: Have you seen her lately? Her eyes wrap around her entire head, and she looks asian and plastic.
A: And I love all things asian. Except her. She scares me.
S: I dont doubt it
OK Alice, hon, THANKS for doing this!
A: No prob!!! This was fun.
OK, now for the exciting NEWS!
I know MOST of you have heard about this, and many have thier opinions about it.
OMNIFIC has given our authors a great opportunity!
And ONE of the authors, who's work will be available on February 16th, is our very own Miss Alice!!
And avoid my squick factor!
EVEN if you do not buy it, and EVEN if you do not like OMNIFIC,
SUPPORT OUR AUTHORS!
Remember, my whole thing about this being a community, folks. So from me. SUE, and the staff of SYTYCW, we wanna say BIG HUGE congrats to Alice, and the other authors who have taken advantage of this opportunity.